Home » Everything else » Stepping out

Stepping out

Advertisements

I don’t like to hold a lot of responsibility, I don’t like being in charge. I don’t like to lead the way, I don’t want to be the one holding responsibility, the one to answer questions, the one they point at if things go wrong, the one to co-ordinate, or the one who has ensure that everything is done the way it’s supposed to be done. I don’t have the confidence and strength to do that. I’m shy and I’m not someone who will initiate stuff.

I don’t mind helping out, or doing something someone wants me to do (as long as it can be done). I feel comfortable this way. It may feel like I depend on someone else. I know that’s not good. And no, I’m not trying to find the easy way out, but I just don’t like to step out of my comfort zone. I just feel comfortable knowing that there’s someone else who I can turn to if things go wrong, or who knows what they are doing. Also, I’m scared to try out new things. And when asked about leadership qualities, I would just elaborate on this little team I led at some little thing and slowly find a way out of that question.

But, in the last few months, I’ve found myself doing stuff, mostly work related, that I never dreamt I would do, frankly I’ve had to step out of my comfort zone, be a bit more responsible because I had no one else to depend on but myself. It’s been hard. I’ve had to work harder, think more and not push off things for another day. I’ve had to be strong.

Now, I have another task at hand, again, something which involves a lot of work, which is tough, and for which I need a lot of confidence. I need to take things to my own hands. I would have to talk to people, get them to do stuff, encourage them and keep the whole thing going. And I just don’t want to do this.

– I know this post is a bit weird. Just a random rant.

Advertisements

4 Comments

  1. Niroshinie says:

    I know just how you feel – believe me. Like you I also don’t want to be the one to tell everyone else what to do. Second in command – yes thats a cool post – but to be that guy (or gal) is just not… well just not me.
    Anyway I was in a similar position for some time and people kept telling me it was good for me – and it probably was. But didn’t change the fact that I was miserable 😦
    Sorry this isn’t much help is it? Just think of it as a learning process and what doesn’t kill you actually does make you stronger 🙂

  2. The Womanist says:

    Heheh.. it’s ok. Yeah, I guess that’s what we’ve got to do 😀

  3. Chavie says:

    I’m sort of the closet Hitler, if you can call someone that. I never want to take leadership, but I eventually end up with it due to some fluke, and end up micromanaging every little thing. I’m a detail freak! 😀 lol

  4. The Womanist says:

    lol!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 6 other followers

Archives

New on the blog

Top Clicks

  • None
%d bloggers like this: